Thursday, March 11, 2010

it's too quiet around here

it's a strange feeling to try to settle into believing that this house with only two children at home will be the norm for a while.  a long while.  two feels so empty. 

maybe it feels so empty now because for years our house was the neighborhood gathering place for play, but now most of our children have outgrown that kind of backyard play; i know it's also because brittany was rarely unaccompanied at home before she left for school.  so when brittany left, so did all the people who used to hang here with her.  the contrast of going from all to nothing is the pits...if the truth be known. 

isn't it funny how when we get what we wish isn't always what we want?  sometimes the back to back to back activity kept me in such a spin that i would just wish for a day with nothing going on.  just one please.  i kept wishing for a little quiet time in between all the rush and fun to just breath...or clean up! 

now i have all the time in the world (so to speak. not really as much as i thought i would).  anyway, i have quiet time every day when my kids leave for school.  i could have the cleanest house in town now - but who wants to spend all their 'free' time cleaning?  ha! i always thought if the world slowed down my house would be so perfectly clean and orderly and organized. yah...right. 

years ago a woman gave a talk in church entitled 'this too shall pass'.  i don't know about you, but i can't remember who spoke on what in church last week, let alone over 3 decades ago. but hers has stuck with me all these years. maybe because i'm now living...and watching younger moms, too, live what she taught.

she talked about living with patience thru the things we struggle with, as they will surely pass.  after she went thru all the stages of life with an example of the things that are hard and make us weary that all eventually pass, she went back and reviewed all the good things in life that are also temporary - and pointed out that they, too, pass.  like the creative date nights when you're starving student/newlywed, or the joy of having a baby to snuggle while having to get up exhausted every two hours to feed them, or the joy of all the gathering of children that takes place in your home while you search for a quiet moment to yourself.  when the struggle of that stage passes, so do the parts that bring us joy - often never to return again. 

the six year gap between brittany and rochelle allowed me to see what passed too quickly in the first two girls' early years, and lead me to treasure more fully those same things in my next two children's lives, realizing that these things - while often accompanied by challenges (i mean really, who actually enjoys any aspect of potty training - except the result at the other end of that struggle) are moments & experiences that i may not have realized would pass so quickly. 

so...what has 'passed'? here's a timy sampling of moments that are now just memories. 

rubbing babies' feet while i nurse them; snuggling each child on my lap; being the loud & proud mom at soccer games; giggling little girls; dressup...lots and lots of it; acting out swan princess; the sound of the flute; dune buggy trips; the magic of christmas when everyone believed in santa claus; massive beach umbrella forts - complete with twinky lights (i know i complained about them...a lot...but i really miss them); barbies; daily gourmet lunches with brittany between school & work; tickle fight dog piles; kids on the swings in the back yard trying to kick the purple tree; jumping on the trampoline with the elmo water sprinkler underneath; sisters helping each other look cute; and an infinate number of other things.

makes me want to take stock of the joys of today that i may just be overlooking, and enjoy them more fully. 

in the mean time...what to do with this new 'quiet' stage of life?  haven't really figured that out yet.  probably should just enjoy it...for surely, it too shall pass!

1 comment:

  1. ahhh, it is amazing how time flies. I will try harder everyday to remember, love and charish my little lady, for someday she too will be out in the world!